Emotions: The Stories They Tell and How They Heal Us and Help Us Grow
What can emotions be telling us?
Emotions and thoughts constantly flow through our body and mind. Like signals, they provide valuable information about how we react to the world across different time horizons and realities. This forms our subjective experience, adding the flavours of life—the sweet, salty, bitter, and spicy.
Our emotions tell us how things are impacting us and what they might be urging us to do. By paying attention to them, we can gain insights into our values, wants, needs, dislikes, likes, pleasant memories, and even traumas.
Being aware of and understanding our emotions can greatly benefit our well-being. Emotions can give meaning to what we’re experiencing and indicate the direction our life is heading. In essence, it also shows just how human we are with our experiences.
However, this doesn’t mean we should follow our emotions blindly. For instance, when I feel angry and lash out at someone, it may express my displeasure and compel them to comply with my demands. But at other times, such actions could escalate into unnecessary conflict and hurt.
There are also times when we need to endure difficult emotions to achieve what we value. Our emotions, wants, and values are often deeply intertwined.
That said, we shouldn’t remain stuck in discomfort without purpose. Emotions can serve as an opportunity to reflect, reevaluate our values, and adjust our actions toward what truly matters.
In essence, emotions are valid because they exist—we cannot deny their presence, pleasant or not. By staying in touch with them through compassion, curiosity, and respect, we can find opportunities to heal and grow.
A Recent Example
About a week ago, I had to do some public speaking. I felt nervous because it had been a long time since I’d spoken publicly, and it was in a new environment. A friend curiously asked, “But you’re a trained counsellor—shouldn’t you be calm?”
I responded with a smile, “Yes, I am a counsellor, but I’m also human. It’s normal for me to have emotional reactions in certain situations.”
In my mind, I also reminded myself: “This nervousness shows how much I care about this event and want to do well. It reflects how I value others’ opinions and my commitment to presenting myself well. Since this situation is uncertain, it’s natural to feel nervous.” Despite the discomfort, I proceeded because fulfilling the task I’d committed to was more important than the temporary unease.
An Activity for You
Take a moment to reflect:
What feelings are you experiencing right now, what might they mean to you or tell you, what are the actions you will need to take or not take?
Here are some core emotions to reference (A more comprehensive list):
Anger
Fear
Sadness
Happiness
Surprise
Disgust
If you’re going through something particularly difficult, consider reflecting and journaling, talking with supportive friends, or reaching out to a coach or therapist for support and insights.
If you found this helpful, feel free to share it with others! If you or someone in your network could benefit from speaking to a therapist, you can reach out to me using this link.
